Pervert Your Sense of Decorum
By Kitty Quinn, Photography by Milan Lazovski, Art by Kitty Quinn & Milan Lazovski
11/9/2023
Female autonomy in the realm of sexuality is a subject shrouded in intricacies, a puzzle of freedom and taboos that are constantly subject to debate in today’s ever-changing world. Though there are endless areas within this realm to be investigated, perhaps the most interesting is how the modern woman seeks to reclaim her sexuality through the act of prioritizing her own pleasure. The societal shift towards revering, rather than obscuring, women who confidently pursue their desires is becoming increasingly more noteworthy.
In this journey towards sexual autonomy, the exploration of sexual fantasies has become pivotal. Serving as a profound and liberating tool for women, it opens a door to the inner psyche and offers a safe haven for self-discovery away from the eyes of public scrutiny. By letting go of preconceived notions of how a woman “should” act by societal standards, women who allow themselves to embrace desires through harmless fantasy not only assert their right to prioritize pleasure but also acknowledge their burgeoning autonomy.
Throughout history, censorship has played a significant role in shaping the narrative that women should feel ashamed in seeking pleasure, opting for the idea that a woman’s only purpose is to please her masculine counterpart. This can be seen in a number of ways ranging from the lack of proper female sexual education to restrictions on artistic expression. Yet, in the midst of these shadows, figures like Madonna and Anaïs Nin have stood as torchbearers of defiance, challenging conventional norms surrounding female sexuality and illuminating the path for others to explore and assert their sexual agency. Despite this, unfortunately, censorship remains a potent force, creating boundaries and labeling subjects as taboo. It keeps women's voices muffled and their narratives incomplete.
One of the most challenging aspects of the female autonomy narrative is disproving the myth that being dominated by a man somehow diminishes a woman's identity as both a woman and a feminist. This misconception often stems from a lack of understanding of the dynamics of consensual power play. It is crucial to distinguish between healthy, consensual dominance and coercive, non-consensual situations. A woman's choice to explore these dynamics should not be used to measure her worth or commitment to gender equality. Feminism, at its core, advocates for women's rights to make choices, including those related to their sexuality. Recognizing that each woman's sexual preferences are personal and independent of her feminist ideals is essential in promoting a more inclusive and accepting society.
The complexity of female autonomy over sexuality represents a continually evolving path towards empowerment. While society's understanding of this autonomy progresses, it's important to cultivate an environment that encourages open conversation, acceptance, and respect for the choices women make. In embracing this, we take a significant step closer to creating a world where every woman's autonomy over her sexuality is truly celebrated and respected, free from stigma and critique.
